HEARTBREAK AND PREVENTION

Heartbreak has become something rampant among the youth in the society, people care and love their partners so much without them realizing that when you care for someone more than they deserve, you get hurt more than you deserve.

Am not saying you shouldn’t care for your partner but be sure the person cares and loves you in return, the same way you do. To those who might have experienced this, I urge you not to feel sad over someone who gave up on you, feel sad for them because they gave up on someone who would have never given up on them but always have it in mind that the emotion that can break your heart is sometimes the very one that heals it. This post will tell us some causes of heartbreak and their possible solutions.

HEARTBREAK

Heartbreak is powerful and at some point, it stops becoming an emotion, a feeling. Instead, it becomes like a gas that fills up your entire body. Heartbreak is a metaphorical emotional pain or suffering experienced alongside a great loss.

What was beautiful, perfect and colorful in the past will now be dull, empty, meaningless and ugly to look at. It affects your thinking faculty, it affects the way you have fun and relate with others. At the beginning of your relationship, you thought you had found the right person and you will be so happy. From happiness to breakup and then to a never-ending bout of loneliness and depression.

CAUSES:

1.         No Understanding of what love is

This is the first reason for heart break. People often take lust for love. Most people don’t really know what love is; at times people take the likeness you have for a person as a unique individual for love, which is not suppose to be. I think people really need to know what they want and love.

2.         Parents influence
People know what they really love but due to the parent interference (their parent might tell them they don’t want to see them with the person), they go for what their heart don’t really belong to. Will your parents spend the rest of your life with you or live together with you in your matrimonial home? This has really broken a lot of marriages

3.         Long time friendship

Some date because they have known each other for so long (High school, Childhood or College friends) and this is one of the painful causes of broken heart because of the high intimacy that already exists.

4.         Our horoscopes don’t match
People believes the horoscope of a thing really works. I don’t really know how true this is  because it hasn’t been used with me but I know it does not work in all cases. I even know of few who have been victims of false prophecy.

5.         Love of Beauty or Material things

I believe this is understandable to an extent. It means that I like parts of you – not you. Some love because of beauty or material things. What if that thing fades away?

6.         You are too good for me.
Is this supposed to make you feel good about yourself or make you feel worse? I have never understand this one. So if I promise not to be as good, will you then love me/marry me? I have never heard of anyone following this reason with a comment like, “I’ll try and be as good as you are so that we can be equal…. lol. Perhaps “You are too good for me” is just to make the perpetrator look good. You obviously have a better idea of what will make me happy. But, will this make you feel good about yourself or make you feel worse?

WAYS TO PREVENT IT:

1.         Be Open to others

The easiest way to get your heart broken is to find one man you're interested in and ignore all of the other great men around him. Instead of focusing all of your energy on one guy, divide it. You're not limited to have one crush.

2.         Don't Settle for Less

You definitely don't want to settle for any random dude that asks you out. Figure out what you really want from a relationship, and then don't settle for anything less.

3.         Socialize yourself

If you don't socialize yourself with other people, it'll be easy to fall too heavily for the one man you actually talk to. But if you're always surrounded by different people, you won't get your heart broken so easily. Not saying you should date all but just maintain friendship.

4.         Follow your desire

Create a vision of your ideal love, make a plan to achieve it and take the first steps to finding the kind of love you want.

5.         Be watchful

Don't date a guy who has done nothing to deserve your time and attention. Make him do a little work, he should put in some sort of effort to show that he's serious about you. If he's not willing to do so, then he does not worth your time.

6.         Have Fun

The best way to avoid getting your heart broken is to have fun in your own way. Don’t ever let your happiness depends on someone

HOW TO OVERCOME IT:

Heartbreak it’s a hard thing to go through and the pain it’s real. Is as if that person, throughout the time we were with them, emblazoned our hearts with tiny little hooks and they are being wrenched out one by one. That’s how it felt to me! But do you know time is a healer? For those who are presently suffering from heartbreak, these are the things to do to less the pain. I believe it will be helpful if you’re going through this right now.

Wallow.

Allow yourself some time to cry and hibernate at home for the first day or two because there is not how you won’t think of it at all. You can’t just shut off the bad feelings. Don’t worry about what you think you should do or what people tell you to do. You just have to do what you need do.

Spend time with your family and friends

You may have spent a few days on your own, so you need to step out of your own thoughts and spend time with someone who is close to you and who you trust. Just let go and spend time with your friends who you felt completely at ease with.

Delete your ex from your social media accounts.

You have to do this because having the temptation to look at what he was doing, who he was with, his last seen and then making assumptions about what was going on in his life would increase the pain and do nothing to heal the heartbreak. Delete their number so you won’t be tempted to text them and you will notice that after each day of no contact you will start to feel a little better.

Commit to not looking at old photos, texts or messages that will remind you of your ex for one month.

Don’t look at his previous messages because doing this, will have you feeling really low.

Laugh!

Watch funny movies and go out with the sole aim of having fun. Do not take alcohol as that only seems to heighten any emotion. The aim should be to just go out and do whatever you think will make you laugh or at the very least smile, and be around people who make you feel good. Laughing is brilliant for an immediate shift in feeling. A smile reduces stress and makes you look younger.

Learn from it and move on

Consider how you can use this experience as a way to move forward. What new habits you need to introduce into your life and the experiences you want to have. Heartbreak is a crippling thing to go through but it’s also an amazing trigger for unleashing raw emotion and creativity that can be channeled in a positive way. It will put you on a path of self-discovery.

Forgiveness really is the key to moving on. Heartbreak is awful, there’s no doubt about it. All these are just the ideas and suggestions of things that can make it easier. There’s no quick fix, but the more you start to gently push yourself in new directions every day, the more clarity you will start to get on the situation. You will be healed in little moments that we don’t even notice. You will put yourself back together in bits and pieces

Learn to enjoy your hobbies again and discover new one

Go back to the hobby that makes you lively before you meet him, and then try to discover new hobbies.

In summary, never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option. Allow the past to be over. The world is still moving, your life is still happening, you’re okay and you will be okay.